What evidence would convince me of the existence of God?

This is a question that comes up fairly frequently in discussion with theists. What evidence would convince me of the existence of God?

I have given this some thought, and in an attempt to bend over backwards for Jesus, Yahweh, Thor, Zuul, or whatever god is out there, if any, here’s what I’ve come up with. Passing either of these very easy tests will suffice for me to believe. Now, loads of atheists would find these tests insufficient. They don’t really test the limits of the deities in questions, nor even the identities of the deities. Any low level demon should have enough power to pass these tests. So, I do open myself up to being fooled by any sort of leprechaun or other mischief making being with magical powers with these tests. Still, I’m confident enough that low level demons don’t exist that I’m willing to accept passing of such a lax test. And, after all, isn’t a low level demon still a magical being? And therefore, compared to me, pretty much a “god?”

So, passing either of these tests will be sufficient for me to consider you a god. Got that? Ok. Wake up all you low-level demons, here’s your big chance to have a worshipper.

Test 1: I am thinking of a number. Tell me what number I’m thinking of by way of a believer. That is, have one of your believers tell me what the number is. This will demonstrate that you’re able to a) read my mind, and b) implant an idea into your believer’s minds. Well, it won’t actually demonstrate that conclusively, but, good enough for me. I’m deliberately relaxing my standards here, on account of I know that gods are traditionally handicapped by failure to exist. Surely a god is capable of this much though. My number is chosen well enough that I’m confident that any being capable of guessing it must be supernatural. You get three guesses. How generous is that? Why would a god need more than one guess? Guess away, god-candidates, and good luck.

Test 2: If the guessing game is too hard, then here’s another one. From time to time, I’ll hold a penny in my hand. All you prospective gods have to do is levitate the penny for a second or two, and only an inch or two, nothing too difficult. Any child could pick up a penny, surely a god can do that much. That’s it, that’s the entirety of the test.

If one day, the penny in my hand should levitate an inch or two, for a second or two, I’ll cease being an atheist. Likewise, if someday, a believer approaches me, and informs me that his deity has told him to tell me a number, and the number he tells me is the right number, I’ll cease being an atheist. It’s really that simple.

So, gods, what of it? Can you pass either of my very easy tests? Surely, given the feats that have been attributed to gods, the tests which I propose should be very very easy for any real deity. If the tests aren’t passed fairly quickly, one can only assume that any extant deities do not want me to believe in their existence (in which case, who am I to argue?) or that they fail my puny tests, on account of failing to exist.

My bet’s on the latter.

~ by scaryreasoner on December 12, 2009.

2 Responses to “What evidence would convince me of the existence of God?”

  1. The number you are thinking of is 1337. Also, I’m levitating a penny right now, you just can’t see it (the absence of evidence is not the evidence of absense!). BOW DOWN AND WHORSHIP ME!

    For me, it’s more about this. If God really exists, and he is all powerful (and he really “loves” us like so many christians tell me)… why wouldn’t he just appear to everyone at once in a vision and say, “I am God, the bible is true, Jesus… that guy.. it all happened the way the bible said. Good day.”? NO ONE would dispute Gods existence after this. Yet we get so many religious people saying that this would destroy the idea of “faith” and that “god wants to remain hidden”, so that he can seek out his most loyal servants (or something equally ridiculous). But then the religious person is tasked with explaining the existence of the BIBLE AND Jesus, which is God saying “LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!”. Why must you remain hidden yet send your son to tell us all about who you are!? The fact of the matter is, the bible is FILLED with people who doubted God, but God (or Jesus) showed them a miracle, IN ORDER TO PROVE HIS EXISTENCE! Yet, NOW, when we need proof more than ever, he seems to be deafeningly quiet.

  2. Wrong number. Not even close.

    And the levitated penny has to be in my possession at the time of levitation.

    But you knew that of course, because, well I spelled it out pretty clearly.

    You make good points, but the point of my post was to bend over backwards for the sake of shutting up the theists who would say “no evidence is good enough for you!” by giving examples of *extremely lax* tests that I would nonetheless consider good enough.

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